When people talk about “doing what you love,” I often see a certain kind of look in their eyes. A mix of skepticism, hope, and — let’s be honest — exhaustion. Because the idea sounds good in theory. But when you’re stuck in a job that drains your energy or scrolling job boards with no clue what you’re really looking for… it starts to feel like a cruel joke.

I get it. I’ve been there too. That uncomfortable space between “I know I don’t want this” and “But what do I want instead?” It’s like standing at a crossroads in the fog. You sense there’s something better out there, but every direction looks the same. And time? Time keeps moving. Rent’s due. People around you seem to have it figured out. So you keep going — even if “going” feels more like surviving than growing.

But here’s the thing no one tells you when you’re stuck in that space: finding a career you love isn’t about making a dramatic leap into the unknown. It’s about clarity. Focus. A different kind of strategy — one that isn’t based on job titles or what looks good on LinkedIn, but on something much more personal.

Your day-to-day tasks.

Yes, I said tasks. Not titles. Not dream job Pinterest boards. Not even passions — because, let’s be honest, that word has been so overused it’s practically lost meaning.

What do you actually want to do all day?

This was one of the biggest shifts in my thinking — and it came from a simple but powerful idea: stop obsessing over the destination, and start looking at the map. What does a Tuesday at 10:30 AM look like in your “dream” job? Are you leading a brainstorming session, buried in spreadsheets, mentoring a junior team member, editing video content, pitching to a client, solving a tricky UX issue?

If the answer is “I have no idea,” that’s not a red flag — that’s your starting point.

One exercise that helped me — and has helped a lot of my clients — is called Me Plus. It’s simple in theory, but if you do it honestly, it’ll change how you think about your career.

Imagine the best version of you — not some far-off fantasy, but the version that feels like an upgraded reality. You, but with more confidence. More energy. Doing work that lights you up. We’re not talking about being a rockstar (unless you want to be one) — we’re talking about a role where your strengths are used daily, your values are aligned with what you do, and you feel a sense of progress.

Now ask yourself: what does that person’s Monday look like? Who do they talk to? What kind of decisions do they make? What skills are they using? What annoyances are they free from?

Write it down. Not just titles or companies. Tasks. Feelings. Situations.

When I first did this, I realized that “Director” or “Founder” or “Coach” weren’t the parts I cared about. What mattered was creating strategies, mentoring others, solving complex problems, and yes — having autonomy over my schedule. That was my Me Plus. And once I saw it, I could start moving in that direction. Step by step. No leap required.

One of the most practical things I did at this stage — and I recommend you try it too — was audit my time. For a week, I tracked how I actually spent my hours. Not just in theory, but in brutal honesty. Meetings, emails, client calls, admin work, distractions, workouts, Netflix. Then I asked myself two questions: Did I enjoy this? And did it move me closer to my Me Plus?

Some tasks got a double plus. Others — a minus-minus. And that’s where the magic started. Because I wasn’t just guessing anymore. I had data. I could see, clearly, what drained me and what energized me. From there, it became easier to make decisions. Delegate more of the energy-sucking tasks. Invest more time in what brought joy and growth.

And if you’re thinking, “That sounds great, but I barely have time to breathe, let alone change careers” — I hear you.

Which brings us to the 13-minute rule.

Professor Grace Lorden — whose book inspired much of what I’m sharing here — talks about compounding. How we understand it in finance (small investments grow over time) but forget to apply it to our own development.

You don’t need three hours a day to start moving toward a better career. You need 13 minutes.

Just 13 minutes a day — or 90 minutes a week — dedicated to something that brings you closer to Me Plus. It could be learning a new skill, networking intentionally, researching industries that intrigue you, journaling, building something on the side.

That’s how momentum starts. Quietly. Without drama. Without quitting your job on a whim or announcing a life pivot on Instagram.

You earn the career you love by building it.

Cal Newport calls this Career Capital — the rare and valuable skills that make you indispensable. When you build capital, doors open. Not all at once, but one by one. That’s how you earn the right to do meaningful work.

And here’s a truth most people miss: you probably don’t need another degree. Not right away. Not unless the career you’re aiming for absolutely requires it. These days, the internet is a goldmine of free and low-cost education. You can learn almost anything — coding, marketing, design, storytelling, data analytics — without setting foot in a traditional classroom.

So don’t use “I need to go back to school” as a default excuse. First, test the waters. Use those 13 minutes a day to explore. Then decide if formal education is really the best next step.

Let’s talk about U-turns. Because this is where a lot of people get stuck. You’ve invested years in a career. Built a reputation. Maybe even reached a decent salary. And now you’re thinking… what if this isn’t it?

The fear isn’t just about change. It’s about being seen as inconsistent. Unstable. Like you didn’t have it all figured out.

But here’s what I’ve learned — and what psychology backs up: we are terrible at predicting what will matter to us in ten years. It’s called the End of History Illusion. We think we’ve reached our final form. But we haven’t. We never really do.

So if your values shift, your interests evolve, or your dreams get clearer — that’s not failure. That’s growth.

Give yourself permission to pivot. Not recklessly. Not with abandon. But with intention. Make decisions based on new data — the data of your own experience. If a direction no longer fits, change it. You’re allowed to evolve.

Which brings me to my last point — and maybe the most powerful one.

Finding a career you love is not a destination.

It’s a mindset. A process. A series of small experiments.

You don’t need a perfect vision from the start. You just need to start. Test different environments. Talk to people in roles that interest you. Volunteer. Freelance. Shadow someone. Follow your curiosity.

Treat your career like a startup. Run low-cost experiments. See what sticks. What drains you. What surprises you. And then — adjust.

That’s what a grid search is. A wide-ranging exploration that slowly leads you to clarity. It’s what I’ve done with every chapter of my own career — from corporate to coaching to content. And when I look back, the dots connect. But when I was in it? It felt like chaos.

So if you’re in that chaos right now, keep going.

You don’t need to “find your passion.” You need to find your next clue. And then another. And another. Until one day, you realize: you’ve built something that fits.

Something that looks a lot like love.

Sometimes, the most frustrating part of this journey is that everyone seems to make it look easy. Scroll through LinkedIn and you’ll see shiny posts from people who “followed their passion,” “manifested their dream job,” or “quit everything and now travel the world with their laptop.” It’s easy to start doubting yourself. To think, “Maybe I missed the boat.” Or worse — “Maybe I’m just not meant for more.”

Let me tell you right now: that’s not true.

You haven’t missed anything. You’re exactly where you need to be — because now, for the first time, you’re asking better questions.

Not “What job should I do?”
But “What kind of work actually energizes me?”
Not “What title do I want on my resume?”
But “What does a good day feel like?”
Not “How can I impress others?”
But “What do I want to wake up to every morning?”

And those are powerful questions. Most people go their whole lives without asking them.

So no — you’re not behind. You’re ahead. Because now, you’re not chasing someone else’s version of success. You’re building your own.

I’ve coached people in all stages of their careers — from fresh graduates to seasoned executives. And one thing I’ve seen over and over again: clarity comes through action. Not thinking. Not talking about change over coffee. Action.

Take the small step.

Read the book.
Reach out to someone you admire.
Block off 13 minutes tomorrow morning.
Audit your week.
Write down your Me Plus vision.
Test something — anything — and gather new data.

It doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to begin.

And once you start walking in the right direction — even slowly — something amazing happens. You begin to trust yourself again. You start seeing options where before there were only walls. The fear doesn’t disappear, but it gets smaller. And your confidence grows in its place.

It’s not magic. It’s not luck. It’s momentum.

You’ll know you’re on the right track not when everything feels easy, but when hard work finally starts to feel worth it. When tired doesn’t mean burned out — it means fulfilled.

And if you want a bit of help on that path, I’ve got something for you.

At the beginning of the article, I promised to share a practical resource — a checklist to help you move toward the kind of career you actually love.

You’ll find questions, reflection prompts, and a framework to help you define your “Me Plus,” audit your time, track your energy, and start designing work that fits who you really are — not just what’s expected of you.

Thanks for reading.
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